End of Life Planning Can Help You Determine What a “Good Death” Means to You
This article was written by ELDR Amy Bishop and originally published at Loyal Hands.
In our culture, when a woman finds out she is going to have a baby, she (perhaps along with her partner) often spends a significant amount of time considering how she would like the birthing process to go.
Does she want a hospital or a home birth? Does she want an epidural? Who does she want to be with her? Even as she makes this plan, there is an understanding that mother nature may take matters into her own hands, and the birth may not go exactly as planned.
Not everyone will have a child, but every single person will die. Wouldn’t it be interesting if we took time to explore and plan for our end of life? What things would one need to consider when creating a plan for a “good death”?
Over 90% of Americans say that Advance Care Planning is important, yet only a little more than 1 in 3 have an Advance Directive, just one part of a complete end-of-life plan.
You Don’t Have to Go It Alone
Creating an end-of-life plan is a highly individualized process that begins with determining your values. What is important to you at the end of life might look very different from the next person. Ask yourself:
If time becomes short for me, what matters most in the time I have left?
Are you someone who wants to let nature take its course?
Is it important that you be free of pain?
How do you feel about the use of life-sustaining measures?
Are you staunchly independent or are you comfortable letting others care for you?
Do you have spiritual beliefs or traditions that you would like to follow?
Would you like to be an organ donor?
Do you want to be buried or cremated?
What should happen to your belongings, your children and pets, your assets?
Some of these questions might be relatively straightforward while others are more existential in nature. This is simply a starting point as there are additional questions that need to be addressed for your relational, practical, financial, etc. needs. It can be profoundly helpful to process your thoughts with someone who can listen objectively and who has no personal attachment to the answers.
You’ll need to determine who will speak for you should there come a time when you cannot speak for yourself and who will carry out your wishes upon your death. Once you have clarified your values and have determined your wishes, it is imperative that you document your plan and discuss it with the relevant loved ones to avoid any confusion or disagreements – emotional and/or legal.
End of Life Planning
By working with a one-on-one end of life educator (like an ELDR), you will have help facilitating these steps and more, resulting in the greatest gift: your personalized end-of-life plan designed to simplify your final days, ease the burden on your loved ones, and give you the “good death” that you desire. Give yourself and those you love this gift by getting started today.
